Once there was a man who lived in a small hut on the edge of the village.
If asked, he could tell people exactly how they could achieve anything they wanted.
Now if this was an epic saga, it would tell of heroes who asked all the right questions and went on to achieve their hearts’ desires.
Instead, this is a tale based in gritty social realism, which means very few people ever got round to asking him anything.
And those that did always had a good excuse for not acting on his advice, so continued to live their lives unfulfilled.
8 comments:
Hi Kim,
Funny, up early this morning... Couldn't sleep so was pursuing some old emails....one I came across was an exchange with you from 2014.... I was in some distress over a job change and you encouraged me... Now I'm checking our bloggy world and here you and your words are again.... A faithful comforting lighthouse for me, blinking away still after almost a decade.... Bug changes again on my end.... Life's seasons changing.... The steadyness of your light is a comfort....
Hindsfeet - With my main blog there mostly to support my photography, my wee philosophical sotries and musings tend to end up on this blog now.
I think you're pretty much the only visitor I get here though :)
Well I appreciate so much this little light in the window...such a comfort...
I was in Alaska for a while, now back in Virginia...after some time and space my husband and I are reconciling....life's big choices, chances...sometimes at odds...
I'll drop a line sometime via antiquated email... I'm perhaps not as brave as I once was, Kim... Maybe time runs out on our wings...or maybe they just find new forms, maybe there is a metamorphosis that happens beyond just the one we're all familiar with.... I hope so...just like there's more than just one time in our lives when "two roads diverge in a wood"...
Write sometime if you'd like, the one thing that hasn't changed over the years is my email address...
Best to you and yours,
Liz ~
~~
Liz - I always feel "brave" is such an odd word that never quite means what we think it does.
In practical terms, "brave" nearly always means, "I wouldn't have done that".
We apply it to the actions of other people when they do something we wouldn't have done.
But when others apply it to us, for exactly the same reason, we never feel brave - instead we tend to feel we did what we had to at the time - the driving force (whatever was behind it) made us feel we had no real choice to do otherwise.
Well put, Kim, I'm going to give your words some thought....and yes, we do what we feel we must at the time...When weighing our options we look at what weighs more.... but whichever choice we make, it seems a part of us gets left behind....I have not learned how to reconcile this...if you know, please share...
I stumbled quite serendipitously onto another poem of Robert Frost's, one I'd never heard of called "Reluctance"...I got to the end and thought, "either way I come out a traitor"...
There must be a healthier outlook...
Your view is one which, for me, carries weight, so if you'd like to weigh in....
Thanks old friend...so very much...
I think part of the ageing process is finding fewer futures open to us.
When we are young the options seem infinite, and as we feel immortal there is all the time in the world to pursue them all.
Then at some point we start to realise that some futures are no longer possible.
I distinctly remember having quite a moment of surprise when I realised I wasn't ever actually going to be an astronaut (something I'd always dreamed of as a child).
And another was when I realised I'd missed the boat if I was ever going to be a rock god (a teenage dream - or possibly even an assumption).
Another 10 years pass and another raft of possibilities no longer seem possible. Although sometimes no longer even desirable.
The classic mid-life-crisis is saturated in this feeling - half (or more) of our lives have gone and we haven't done a fraction of the things we assumed we would.
People we know have died and we become far more aware of our mortality. We no longer have infinite options and an infininte amount of time.
Living with Chronic Fatigue has forced me to face the fact there are many things I now cannot do, and will never do.
We grieve for lost futures.
However, if we are to find a way to combat this and move forward rather than feeling swallowed in the overwhelm of loss, then we have to focus on what we can do, rather than what we can't.
This lesson is continually being to taught to me by my daughter, who has Down's Syndrome.
The condition means there are many things she is unable to do.
In times past, people with DS were written off and institutionalised - babysat until they died.
But there are many things that Meg can do, and once we focus on that, then new possibilities emerge. We look to find support for the things she can't do and allow her to flourish with the things she can.
So she is very sociable. She loves people. She loves baking. She loves cafes.
So we are now in the process of setting up "Megalicious" - megaliciousfood.co.uk (or @megaliciousfood on Instagram and Facebook) - where she will sell gluten free (she's coeliac) baking at producer's markets, and run occasional pop-up cafes.
With help and support in place she has a bright future, even if she will never be an astronaut or a rock star :)
Whichever road we chose, we can feel the loss of the road not taken, or we can make the most of the road we're on and enjoy the future we are making for ourselves.
I'm hoping that by writing this, I'll actually take note of it myself... ;)
xx
Always grateful for the companionship of your words on this journey, Kim... Any chance you wouldn't mind republishing your brambleberry story here for me to read again or listen to, I think it was an audio recording, maybe it was both... But I think that's how you first came on my radar and I remember it making such an impression and it comes to mind that it might be extremely apropos now... Anyway, if you still have it, I'd be much obliged....
Liz - unfortunately the audio recording no longer exists as the online system I was using is long defunct. However, you can find "The Biggest Bramble You Ever Did See" on my main blog, here:
https://kimayres.blogspot.com/2007/08/biggest-bramble-you-ever-did-see.html
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